Throughout our life, our pre and post marital relationship continuously change with a change in circumstances, the level of stress, growing of kids, professional demands, and the everyday ups and down that you and your partner experiences.
A major reason of romantic relationship degradation is when one or both the partners misses to identify and understand these changes and change their approach toward's life accordingly.
So how can you respond to relationship changes? Relationship and Marriage Counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo says a great starting place is to evaluate your own contributions to your relationship. What are you doing that helps—or hurts—your relationship happiness? How are your actions and beliefs influencing the quality of your and your partner’s everyday interactions?
Counsellor Shivani today shares some vital tips for couples on how to become an effective and awesome partner, i.e. ideal partners who are capable of driving out their relationship wonderfully in every situational change in their life:-
1. Sleep More
Yes, you heard it right; to be a better partner, a good focus is required, by both the people to get adequate sleep. In today’s fast moving society, people have made their sleep routine a less significant aspect of life, as compared to their professional demands, late night entertainment etc.
Remember sleep deprivation or irregular sleeping pattern, affect a person’s energy, mental alertness, mood and fluctuates glucose levels in the body which adversely affects self-control. And self-control plays a big role in relationship success: Those with higher self-control are more capable of responding in constructive ways to their partners, and the more self-control couples have, the higher their relationship quality tends to be.
However good sleep routine does not mean that you sleep less during the week and wake late on weekends, rather good sleep means you go to bed and wake up every day at the same time, so your body gradually learns to develop sleep and wake up cycle and works effectively.
2. Never forget Love is not a noun but a verb
Try to always remind yourself the famous song by John Mayer “Love is not a noun but a verb”, in other words, love need continuous nurturing to make the relationship blossom over the time. There are certain behaviours which make a difference in relationship happiness.
These maintenance behaviors often come naturally, but intentional efforts to engage in them could benefit relationships. Research underscores the power of these seven behaviours in particular which predict relationship satisfaction such as liking, love, and commitment:
1. Express happiness and pleasure while spending time together.
2. Understanding. Listen, forgive, apologize, and refrain from judging your partner.
3. Self-disclosing. Share feelings and encourage your partner to do the same.
4. Openness. Clearly, state what you need or want in the relationship.
5. Sharing tasks. Equitable shared responsibilities (e.g., family, household chores, financial management etc ).
6. Involve networking. Spend time with your partner’s friends and family.
3. Never miss the opportunity to share gratitude with your partner
Feeling grateful is one thing but telling your partner is another. Do you express your gratitude? It turns out that sharing your feelings of gratitude is linked to positive partner perceptions and a willingness to voice relationship concerns, which helps maintain healthy relationships.
4. Spend quality time with your partner
Make a routine once in a week to spend quality time with your partner. Spending quality time together increases the relationship satisfaction. To ensure the time you spend together turns out to be high-quality time, keep a check on yourself and ask your partner to do the same that you will not discuss any topic related to kids, financial services, office, colleagues, in-laws etc. Rather discuss topics like - wonderful memories of your honeymoon, of your pre-marriage days etc.
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