In our professional, educational, social and family life, we keep listening to criticism from time to time from our spouses, parents, friends, relatives, co-workers, bosses, teachers and even sometimes from strangers. Generally, criticism causes a mild disturbance in us or it sparks anger, cross criticism, ignorance, arguments or it can even make us sad. In reality, listening to criticism or criticizing is a natural phenomenon, after all, we all are unique and while staying or working together, clashes and disapprovals are bound to happen.
However, if criticism comes from a dysfunctional relationship or from political motives – then it can surely cause some damage to a person. For example, if a criticism is used as a tool to demotivate or to suppress a person by an insecure senior in the office or constant criticism used by a depressed spouse – then chances are high that criticism in such circumstances severely harms the mental and physical well-being of the person.
So the question is how to fight malicious criticism?
Talking on this matter, Delhi’s eminent psychologist & Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares 5 strategies to handle criticism in any given situation and they are:
1. Stay Calm:
The very moment you start hearing criticism your body too start reacting to it. Like your heart starts to beat faster, your palm starts sweating. Hence the first step is to control yourself by breathing deeply and this will help to calm down or at least help you stabilise. Remember malicious criticizers want to see you sad, pained and depressed. Hence achieving calmness is your first line of defence as it will communicate to the criticizer that their efforts are going in vain.
2. Listen
Remember the second important factor that can help you win over the criticizer is giving an appropriate and intelligent answer. If you calmly and intelligently answer to a criticizer, the chances are high that the situation will turn in a way where the criticizer may look like a fool as his/her decision to criticize will be in question.
That is why the second step is to listen carefully to the criticizer, keep silent till the time criticizer finish telling. When you hear the person completely you get the opportunity to analyze what they have said and you can well prepare your response. This way you can reply the person appropriately and intelligently.
3. Don’t expose to criticism from people you don't respect
Try to pay attention to criticism from people whom you respect at the same time try to shield yourself from criticism from people whom you don't know or don't respect, because criticism from useless sources will possibly make you reactive, restless and angry – nothing more. Similarly, if you get positive criticism, say about your writing skills, act on it.
4. Sometimes appriciation of self-failure is necessary
When you try new things and aim for something high in life or follow a path that is less taken – you will definitely be exposed to a lot of criticism. While listening to such criticism– remind yourself that such criticism means you have started to do something important in life.
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