ON AND OFF AGAIN RELATIONSHIPS, WHY IT HAPPENS

Romantic breakups are commonly filled with grief, hardship, and self-negativity. Still for a few couples, breaking-up is part of their relational system. They remain together, time flies, things do not work, they break-up and then they again try it. Thinking It might be different this time or maybe it is. But it's often not. On-again and off-again. It keeps repeating. Relationships with a history of breaking up and getting back together are what relationship scientists termed it as cyclical relationships.

It's confusing. Why do people repeatedly return to the same relationship when it never seems to be working? Is there something magnetic about the relationship? Is there something about certain people? Or is it something completely different, like structural forces that could encourage people to be together and stop them from easily leaving?

In this article, Delhi’s eminent relationships expert and marriage counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo talks about on and off again relationships, why it happens.

It's Not Because of Their Relationship Quality

Relationships having a break-up history is not of higher quality than non-cyclical relationships. It's a logical theorem: maybe the love, emotional attachment, and general satisfaction experienced in certain relationships entice people to keep going back to them. This doesn't seem to be the scenario; in fact, consistent proof shows that relationships with cycling, history is of poorer quality than non-cyclical relationships.

Persistent Feelings Re-Start Relationships

Even if the intimacy, passion, and love when dating isn't as potent as non-cyclical relationships, what happens when a couple breaks up might be the reason they stay together. After a break-up, feelings of love, nostalgia, and concern for a former partner may continue. For a few people, these persistent feelings are enough to try and re-start the relationship.

Loneliness Is a Motivator

Leaving a relationship mostly means entering a phase with fewer ready companionship. For some individual, the desire not to be alone is a motivation to return to a former partner.

How One View Sex might be a part of the Story

Certain scenarios suggest that people in cyclical relationships place higher importance on the passion and the sexual component of their relationship than the person in non-cyclical relationships. Assessment of passion and how well a relationship meets physical needs also looks to be a stronger forecaster of relationship satisfaction for people in cyclical versus non-cyclical relationships.

Believing In Soul Mates is not an Element

Some individuals approach relationships as a search for the one (for example they grasp destiny beliefs) while others believe that relationships develop with work (growth beliefs). In other words, how you look at love as fate or as work doesn't appear to predict involvement in a cyclical relationship.d