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Showing posts from 2015

Do you know 80% of us hold our breath while reading emails?

Email Apnea is one major reason for work stress, headache, and weak concentration.
While reading or writing emails 80% of people simply “forget” to breathe properly, they either hold their breath for long or slow it down. This phenomenon called, “email apnea” or “screen apnea”.and is one of the primary reason of having headache and anxiety in the workspace.  Holding or slowing breath causes deficit of oxygen flow to the brain and results in headaches, increased stress, loss of concentration and fatigue.
So what can you do to “breathe right” when you are focusing 100% on writing / reading emails or on the computer screen, since email apnea happens unconsciously?
A simple Pranayama exercise you can use anytime throughout the day to restore oxygen flow to your brain is called Sama Vritti or “equal breathing”. Take 10 minutes break from your work routine and sit upright and comfortably on office chair and place your hands on your knees.Close your eyes and simply notice your breath, without tr…

Passionate Love vs Compassionate Love?

It is true, no word and sentence is enough to define love; one can understand it only when he/she falls in love. But do you know love can be passionate, compassionate and or the both. Today Relationship Counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares what is compassionate and passionate love.
Compassionate love is primarily characterized by two people’s mutual respect, attachment, affection, and trust. Compassionate love usually develops out of feelings of mutual understanding and shared respect for one another. Passionate love on another hand is characterized by intense emotions, sexual attraction, anxiety, and affection.
Passionate love generally arises when the two people meet each other’s preconceived ideas of an ideal love, and when they both experience physiological arousal in the presence of the other person.
Generally, passionate love doesn’t last more 6 months to 2 years, then ideally it should mature into compassionate love, which is far more enduring.

Everyone desires their relationship…

The "Coming out Experience" of a Gay, Lesbian and Homosexual Person

The psychologist community in recent times has found out and has confirmed that Gay, Lesbian and Homosexuality are not a disorder but a form of sexual expression. Psychologists suggest that one of the important incidences in the life of LGBT is the coming experience. In fact , coming out is more a process than an experience and research has found out that same-sex couples who are openly gay are more satisfied in their relationships. For women who self-identify as lesbians, the more people know about her sexual orientation, the less anxiety, more positive affectivity, and greater self-esteem she has. Today Psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares what is the coming out experience and what are the stages one possibly experiences in their coming out experience.
What is the 'coming out' experience of an LGBT person?
Coming out is a process of understanding, accepting, and valuing a person’s sexual identity. It involves both exploring a person’s own identity and it's impact with o…

Questions One Must Ask During a Bad Phase of Relationship

Sometimes bad phase in a relationship becomes so strained that intellectual possibilities to overcome bad situations by the couple get hijacked with pain, feeling of betrayal and confusion. Generally, such a condition itself snowballs into end of a relationship. If you know someone going through such unfortunate situation, then you can share with them the following tips by Delhi’s eminent Relationship Counsellor, Shivani Misri Sadhoo.
1. First, couple should ask themselves, if they are destroying themselves, hurting their partner and their relationship, based on anger and strong emotions? If yes, then slow down and evaluate. Avoid confronting your partner until you’re calm and can carefully weigh your bad relationship phase.
2. Secondly, couple should avoid assumptions like their current state of unhappiness is solely the fault of the relationship; there could be other issues too, like bad financial situation, unnecessary attraction towards a colleague, frustration in career etc. Rememb…

How to Improve Concentration Power Among Kids?

Concentration is an essential component of every child’s development; it is required to perform well in academic, to do effective social interaction, to develop leadership & confidence and to learn life skills.
Generally, the level of concentration and focus among kids varies as per their level of mental & physical tiredness, addiction to TV or mobile games, peer influence, etc. However if kids are not supported and encouraged by parents to increase their focus and concentration, they may develop permanently a poor concentration level, all through their childhood. 
Today, child psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares some important parenting tips on how to improve a child’s concentration power.
1. Develop positive habits in your child: like doing homework, eating dinner, going to bed at the same hour every day. Repeating the same activity every day at the same hour, eventually, turns it into a habit. If a child sits down for homework every day at the same hour, after a while, wh…

How to deal with negative and unpleasant people?

A human being is generally conditioned to his/her environment and situations. Unfortunate situations like bad health, strained relationships, financial issues or personal loss can turn your colleagues, neighbours or friend’s behaviour unpleasant and negative. In a satiation where you have to deal with such a person every day then what you will do; will you avoid, ignore or confront the person? Likely in all these three options you will lose your peace of mind. Today Psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo share tips on how to deal with people who are negative or unpleasant.
1. Resist the urge of being judgemental. Generally, the first urge that comes to mind if someone is unpleasant to us is to be judgemental; we tell ourselves that the person is an idiot, jerk, nonsense etc.  Remember tagging the person may give you momentary comfort from the insult but if you have to deal with the person every day, such a judgement will just make the things get worse day by day.
2. Be compassionate but also…

How to Build Confidence, Self-Assurance and Self-Esteem in Kids

Confidence is a child’s passport to a lifetime of positive mental health, social happiness and long-term academic & professional progress. In other words self-assurance and self-esteem during childhood can be termed as the foundation for every child to lead a positive life and to get well prepared for the future.
However, in today’s demanding academic structure, it is not easy for a child to maintain a good confidence level, from competing nursery admission to weekly school tests, today’s child goes through numerous examinations, almost every day in his/her life and he/she is being judged both at home and outside. According to child psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo, oral communication alone by parents is not enough to build confidence in kids, she shares some important parenting tips that will help parents in this area:
1. Allow your child to make decisions:
When your child gets the chance to make choices from a young age, he/she will build confidence in their own judgement. Just co…

Don’t Practice Too much Self Control

Self-control is the ability to control one's emotions, behavior, and desires in the face of external demands. In psychology, it is also termed as self-regulation. It is true that self-control is an essential ingredient to achieve goals in life, for an example, one cannot meet weight loss target if he/she do not restrict their own desires to eat and sleep. Most of us believe that self-control is a quality that make us better than the rest but do you know that there are many prices one has to pay to maintain self-control IF WE DO NOT discriminate ‘when to’ and ‘when not to’ use self-control. 
Today Psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares how too much of self-control can make our life bad.
1. Accepting uncontrolled and unanticipated outcomes become difficult. When a person keeps their self-control unchecked they start believing that all future outcomes can be anticipated and it is the result of cause and effect of past and present actions. This phenomenon is true to some extent, but it…

Television Alters Child’s Brain Structure: How to stop your child from watching TV?

Those who were born in 80’s must have remembered how cartoons programs where only telecasted on Sunday mornings. Now TV has more than 10 channels that telecast children programs for whole day. With abundance of cartoon programs and kids show, today’s children are turning addicted to TV and gradually parents are now finding it difficult to stop their kids from watching Television.
So, why you should stop your child from watching TV?
Recently, Neuroscientists in Japan have out that watching television alters a child’s brain structure. The more hours a child watches the TV, the more his/her brain structure will change. The brain regions that are bulked up in children watching more television include grey matter increases in the hypothalamus, septum, sensory motor areas and visual cortex, but also in a frontal lobe region (frontopolar cortex), which is known to lower verbal IQ.  Tests confirmed that the children’s verbal IQ had lowered in proportion to the hours of TV watched, ranging from …

Overcome pain in a conscious process rather than with uncertainty

Life can never be 100% perfect and we do pass through emotional and mental setbacks, time to time in the form of failed relationships, loss of jobs, negative health events etc. These events are unavoidable, but sometimes we may get emotionally stuck to such an event to such an extent that we end up losing many things in the process. For example, post-breakup a person who keeps on holding the pain may develop a low level of concentration, low  on confidence, become irritable and may lose his/her job or friends who matter to them. So how to overcome pain from failures, rejections and losses in a conscious process and not by uncertainty? Here are some tips you can use or suggest to your loved ones to overcome failure, loss or rejection and regain their normal living:
1. Make yourself remember your goals in life: you may have faced a break-up or job loss, but there are other priorities in life too like your parent’s happiness, you friend’s happiness, your career and they don’t deserve your …

Are you feeling SAD?

Most of us feel melancholy in winters when days get short, foggy and cold but for some, winter brings unwarily persistent low mood, irritability, tearfulness, lack of interest in normal day to day activities. These are signs that you might be suffering from winter depression or in medical terms known as seasonal affective disorder (SAD).
Why winter depression happens? scientists believe winter depression is related to the way the body responds to daylight. When daylight enters our eye it stops the production of the sleep hormone, melatonin in our body and this process helps us to get awake. Scientists believe in SAD sufferers produces a higher level of melatonin levels during winters and this causes them to feel lethargy and depression.
How to fight winter depression:
1. Spend more time outside in the sun: get outside as often as you can, especially on bright days. Sitting by a window can also help.
2. Eat a lot of fruits and vegetables: Winter blues generally increase the curving for swe…

Empowering Yourself - You Can Choose Not to be Sad

1. Avoid thinking about the people who has hurt you
Another person’s hurting words and actions can certainly trigger sad thinking and feelings but remember over thinking on those words will lead you nowhere. Putting your energy to think another people’s actions and behaviour, on which you have no control, can lead you in a state of sadness, self-compassion and hopelessness. Psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo suggests on such conditions when another person hurts you, remember yourself that you have no control on another person’s actions and mindset, be it good or bad. So don’t waste your time or energy thinking about the incident. Instead of that, focus on inner conversations, self-analysis and put efforts to improvise things in your life and its goals.
2. Embrace optimism in your life:
Often when people get hurt they explain things to themselves in a pessimistic way. AVOID that. Remember very often pessimistic thinking approach leads to self-isolation, depression and withdrawal. What is r…

Why ‘soon to get married’ couples should consider premarital coaching?

Premarital coaching is a type of session that supports the 'soon to get married' couples to get well prepared for the challenges that married life can throw at them over the period of time. The sessions are conducted by an expert relationship counsellors who prepare the couples for a stable and satisfying marriage. During premarital coaching, a couple learns how to not only be committed to each other but how to also be committed to the marriage itself. In brief it helps: -
1. Couples can talk about a problem before it’s too late
Premarital coaching is a chance for couples to dig up any potential dangers that can weaken their marriage from lasting a lifetime. Relationship Counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo tells us that it does not matter how charismatically a man or woman talks but it takes a trained and experienced eyes and mind to identify if the person holds immature beliefs and values concerning: money, child-raising, in-laws, partnership, etc.
Hence relationship counsellor / co…

Tips to Move your Focus from Negativity to Self-Belief

Our mind has a tendency to react strongly and memorize negative incidences in life than to positive ones.  For example, we tend to remember bad and hurting words from our friends or relatives more than the genuine smiles and their kind & encouraging words.
Keeping stored the negative information while not prioritizing the positive may not do any immediate harm in life but if the tendency remains unchecked, then the person is likely to develop this attitude into a habit that can result into endless number of physical and psychological diseases like – high blood pressure, heart problem, anxiety, depression and stress.
As per Shivani Misri Sadhoo, an eminent psychologist in Delhi, nobody has control over unpleasant situations but everyone does have the option to maintain a healthy mind and mood. She shares some basic tips that can help a person to shift their focus of life from negativity to self-belief.
1. Ask yourself better questions: Some people deal negative situations by complaini…

5 Proven Ways to Introduce Fitness Into Your Child's Life

In the day and age where technology turns your child into a couch potato, introducing fitness into his/her life can be a real challenge. These trends have slowly given rise to obesity, diabetes and high blood pressure in children- diseases that they were never touched by. So it is very important to introduce fitness into your child’s life, now more than ever.

1. Get involved: It is known that children learn more by example than by instruction. Do fun activities yourself like swimming, playing basketball, going on long walks and take your child along with you. Start small, by doing this at least once a week, and then increase gradually. Not only will this encourage your child to be more fit, it will also create a deeper bond between the two of you.

2. Introduce fun activities: Structured activities such as a sport are great ways of introducing your child to fitness. Enrol your child for some routine sport classes, particularly team sport. This way your child learns essential values such …

How to Develop Introspection in Teenagers that is Essential for their Growth?

In today’s time teenagers hold high priority to their interactions through social media profiles and they are getting glued to their smartphones, day by day. No matter if they are at home or in a social gathering, more than involving themselves in a real conversation with their parents, siblings or even with their friends, their one portion of concentration is always attached with their Facebook or twitter profiles – how should they share a current moment in the social media? or how many likes and comment have appeared for their last updated post or pic? etc. As per psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo there are many negative implications of this trend but one primary damaging factor among teenagers: they are losing their ability to sit in silence, do introspection, to do thoughtful real life discussion and most importantly they are missing the ability to be 100% present in the current situation. Psychologist Shivani shares that adolescence is a time when young people discover their uniqu…

Tips to Support Your Loved Ones Who Are Suffering From Dementia

According to the world Alzheimer report; by 2020 around 10 million Indians above age of 65 would suffer from dementia. Dementia refers to a condition of decline in mental ability to severe enough to lead a healthy day to day life.  Possibly many amongst us are already taking care of someone who is suffering with dementia.  According to PsychologistShivani Misri Sadhoo taking care of loved ones suffering from dementia is a full-time job and remembering the following tips can make the caretaker’s job less stressful.
1. Don’t allow yourself get emotionally hurt if the patient talks or behaves with you badly, remember your loved one is not changing but it’s the disease, which is progressing.
2. Don’t push the patient to change their behaviour and attitude towards you like they had once before the disease. Even though it's painful to see the negative changes in personality of loved ones but it’s not possible to gain back old personality once the brain functioning starts declining, so try…

How to Defeat Procrastination?

Procrastinate is referred to a practice when a person put off things that he or she should be focusing on right now, usually in favour of doing something that is more enjoyable or that he or she is more comfortable doing. 
Everyone procrastinates some part in their life, but some people suffer from chronic procrastination i.e. they continuously find difficulty to sit and start difficult tasks and deliberately look for distractions.  In psychological terms, procrastination is referred to a condition when there is a temporary gap between intended behaviour and enacted behaviour.” That is when there are significant time period between when people intend to do a job and when they actually start it. Procrastination in large part reflects our perennial struggle with self-control as well as our inability to accurately predict how we'll feel tomorrow, or the next day. 
Today Psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo suggests how to overcome procrastination.
1. Start your work with a good mood: Procr…

What it Takes to Become an Emotionally Resilient Person?

Emotional resilience refers to one's ability to adapt to stressful, situations or crisis, i.e. it’s referred to the ability to face adversity without lasting difficulties. While less resilient people have a harder time with stress and life changes. In other words, resilient people do not let adversity define them. They find resilience by moving toward to a goal beyond themselves, transcending pain and grief by perceiving bad times as a temporary state of affairs. So how is it possible to strengthen your inner self and your belief?  Psychologist Shivani SadhooMisri shares today the features of an emotionally resilient person: -
1. An emotional resilient person cultivates self-awareness: Self-awareness is simply the practice of checking in with your Self to see how you’re feeling emotionally, physically, mentally, and spiritually. This could happen once a day, several times a day, after a difficult interaction with another person… whenever. Cultivating a healthy self-awareness is cruci…

What Can Happen if Someone Takes Medicines Without Prescriptions?

Prescription drug abuse is referred to a condition where the person uses medication without a prescription, in a way other than as prescribed, or for the experience or feelings elicited. Taking medication without prescriptions or taking it in a wrong way, over a period of time can do more harm than one can anticipate, in many case such situation leads to addiction.
Prescription drug abuse addiction commonly happens from two kinds of medicines (a.) painkillers that contain opioids and (b.) anti-depressants such as benzodiazepines (Xanax, Valium, Ativan, Klonopin) that are used to treat anxiety and sleep disorders.
In recent years, there has been a dramatic increase in prescription drug misuse or abuse. Once this problem is detected for most people, it is only the beginning of a long-term battle against craving and relapse.  Hence, Psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo suggests that if a person doubts that he/she is suffering from prescription drug abuse addiction, he/she should immediately  …

Avoid these Phrases to Save Your Friendship

In today’s fast track lifestyle, we have become so occupied with our day to day life that many amongst us can hardly give enough time to our friends. Unfortunately, this leads to an end of friendship or weakening of the friendship bond.  No doubt most of us blame our friend for such incidences and possibly the friend to do the same.
Relationship Counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo tells us that we should be very careful while responding to our friends through social media, chat, WhatsApp and choose our words carefully. Here is the list of some killer phrases that kill the friendship:

1. The first killer phrase “I am busy”We use the word “busy” for everything, “this week is office target deadline, I am dead busy”, “I could not call your sorry I was so busy” etc. Remember today everyone is busy, your friend is not spending time uselessly so he / she has pinged you.
The vague nature of saying “I’m really busy” leaves the real reason why you’re being unavailable, open to self-assumptions. While …

In Winter Make Sure Your Child Gets Enough Sunlight

In next two to three months we are going to cover ourselves with woolens and jackets. Winters are, no doubt, an exciting time of the year for adults and as well as for children. Kids relate winters with Christmas, New Year celebrations and with their winter holidays. However this is also the time when dense cloud covers, fog and smog reduces the ultraviolet rays reaching the skin.
Hence parents should take extra care during winters that their kids get sufficient sunlight every day to produce Vitamin D in their body. Recent studies have found out that serotonin, oxytocin and vasopressin – three brain hormones that affect social behaviour – are all activated by Vitamin D.

These hormones help in shaping the structure and wiring of the brain - where it shapes the structure and wiring of the brains, acts as a neurotransmitter and affect the social behaviour.






What does it take to become Emotionally and Physically Healthy?

Being emotionally and mentally healthy doesn’t mean never going through bad times or experiencing emotional problems. We all go through disappointments, loss, and change. And while these are normal parts of life, they can still cause sadness, anxiety, and stress.
The difference is that people with good emotional health have an ability to bounce back from adversity, trauma, and stress. This ability is called resilience. People who are emotionally and mentally healthy have the tools for coping with difficult situations and maintaining a positive outlook. They remain focused, flexible, and creative in bad times as well as good. Psychologist Shivani Sadhoo Misri today shares some effective but simple daily tips. When one chose to make these tips their daily habits, then physical and emotional well-being  are bound to improve.
1. First, make a routine to get enough rest, every day. Working late hours may give you one or two days of extended productivity but unknowingly it will put decrease yo…